Pain… Pain… Go Away
I was in my early 30’s when I realized the pain wouldn’t go away; when I had to shift my life and accept it instead of fight it. I didn’t discover until then that I had hypermobility that was complicating an injury from many years prior. I’ve got cervical joint dysfunction, aka subluxation of my C1 & C2 vertebrae, aka whiplash. Functionally I was able to work and live for quite some time before my chronic pain became truly “disabling”, which happened right when I became a mama to my baby girl.
Looking back at my own childhood, it makes sense now:
why I injured my forearm scooping ice cream at my first job as a teen
why I could roll my ankles playing basketball competitively and not need crutches
why my friends always thought it was weird my fingers could bend so far back or my eye would turn in sideways without glasses.
I’m still navigating this road to a definite diagnosis… but knowing the impact of hypermobility on recovery and stability has helped me understand my body better and set more realistic rehabilitative goals. Throughout life’s natural curve balls, my body has faced many challenges with stress and strain working in healthcare, injuries with sports, and general aches and pains of general life demands and roles.
Side Note…
May I ask… why is it a societal norm/ expectation that when you become a parent you will suffer with some sort of pain?! Be it head, shoulders, knees or toes? (Too many kid songs in my head.) I’ve had people blankly tell me that it is “common to experience back pain when you become a parent”, in attempts to downplay my report of pain. Excuse me, what? No pain is normal.
My neck goes out of alignment from walking my dog around the block due to a previous accident.
My hips can get misaligned with lifting due to pelvic separation with the birth of my daughter.
Formula was my friend as I couldn’t breastfeed my daughter due to the physical load on my neck and hips at the time.
Chronic Pain
Does Not
Define Me
From the chronic pain of these traumas, I’ve now gotten a diagnosis of fibromyalgia, which everyone knows is a love-hate relationship. I’m still in a constant internal tug-of-war with myself: being defeated vs being resilient.
It’s made me question my identity,
what makes me ME,
my career,
my dreams and ambitions,
and challenged me to my core.
It’s altered my relationships but it’s made my marriage stronger.
It’s made me honest with myself.
It’s made me want to do more for ALL that struggle with chronic pain and meeting the needs of their young children.
I don’t have all the answers. But I will share what I’ve learned, some tips & tricks, and hopefully create a network where others can read to get more resources or support.